While I may be past the point of adding to my family, many women are waiting until later in life to think about having a baby. In light of this, I thought it may be useful to share my experience and what I’ve learned over the years of desperately trying to conceive.

Our fertility is something we tend to take for granted until we reach that point in life when we start thinking about having a family or adding to it.  It’s only then, some of us come to the harsh realisation, all is not what we assumed it to be. What we thought was guaranteed, isn’t necessarily so. That’s certainly how it was for me and is for millions of others. Your desperation to satisfy that instinctive need to have a baby is almost tangible when the odds are stacked against you. Some are fortunate enough never to experience this emotional overload, but knowing what it’s like, hopefully sharing my experience may give those in a similar situation hope that miracles do happen.

• Fertility drugs

Endometriosis and polycystic ovaries assured me anovulatory cycles, where no egg was released, and which lasted for at around 60-70 days. I was prescribed clomid and tamoxifen up to the maximum dozes, for longer than strictly speaking is recommended. This went on for a couple of years. On and off. As the doses increased so did the side effects. The hormonal swings, fluid retention, cramps and headaches.  There was also the emotional investment in whether or not the drugs had worked, and living by the ovulation tests I did religiously. That was until I realised they’re useless when your cycle is as long as mine was! Half way through my final tamoxifen cycle I decided it was time to try something else.

• IVF

I finally accepted I had to have IVF. By that point my need for a baby was completely inescapable; all consuming. What a trip IVF was.

IVF is a miracle treatment for so many. I wasn’t however one of the great success stories. My devastation over its failure surprisingly eclipsed the heartbreak of my natural miscarriage at 10 weeks, years earlier. I can only imagine that’s down to the physical toll it takes on you with all of the injections, blood tests and procedures. There’s also a hormonal tornado sweeping through you. Repeatedly. That’s quite something in itself. It took me a several months to think about doing it all again. But once you start IVF, your mindset becomes one of this is my only option now. There was just a slight problem. As I was psyching myself up once more, Covid struck. All new IVF cycles were cancelled and life as we knew it was turned upside down. The brakes were put on the nation and IVF was but a distant hope in amongst the dreams of better days to come. But as they say, all clouds have a silver lining.

• Fertility Supplements

Life during Covid unquestionably slowed down and like everyone else my priorities changed. My mum was one of those shielding and my parents were reliant on me to deliver everything from the outside world during those dark days. It was really about keeping family and friends safe and making it through. My baby dreams were fading and as far as I was concerned, pretty much over. Who knew how long the pandemic would last.

One change I had made at the end of my failed IVF cycle was however starting to have an effect. My faith in fertility drugs and all medical interventions at that point was rock bottom. Quite simply, I was sick of it. I’d put all my hopes and dreams into it succeeding and I’d been left high and dry. Wrecked actually.  So, I was more than happy to try an alternative. But I didn’t have one.  It was a recommendation from a friend who had a truly tumultuous time conceiving which provided the answer. She suggested The Natural Health Practice Advanced Fertility Supplements for women. These combined with IVF worked for her. I’d been so caught up in all the medical options, I hadn’t given the herbal route a thought. There really was nothing to lose so I had started to take them.

Little did I know these had been quietly working away in the background for the past several months. Around three or so months after starting them, I had a 40-day cycle. The following month a 35-day cycle. This hadn’t been the case for more years than I could remember. The cycles started to follow such a predictable pattern I kind of had an idea when ovulation was happening. I was so contemptuous of the whole thing though, I was pretty disdainful of the fact that, even with this shiny new cycle, anything could come of it. I’d mentally moved on from any dreams of conceiving naturally. I even bought a puppy, taking our dog tally up to three, thinking it was the only baby we’d be bringing home again. But we gave it one shot. There was no pressure, no expectation, no acknowledgement of any possibility that it could lead to anything.

Boom!

A month or so later, I’d taken my mum to hospital for a minor procedure, but at the height of the pandemic. After that I felt tired and intermittently nauseas and the ibuprofen and the Berocca weren’t doing anything. I assumed I had covid. But the symptoms didn’t match up. After another week or so, the cogs started turning and I very reluctantly bough a pregnancy test. I’m not sure if anyone else who’s had fertility issues can relate to this, but oddly, buying them had become a pet hate. I despised forking out for those tests and waiting for the inevitable devastation of my hopes and dreams. Not this time though. Boom! I was a month along. I was stunned. It took me an hour to tell my husband because I didn’t believe it. Such little effort. No drugs. No IVF. No ovulation tests. No expectation. Reflecting on it now, it was just the supplements, a quieter life and an unintentional but significant cut in my caffeine intake given my inability to satisfy my Pret coffee addiction. That’s all I can put it down to.

These supplements quite literally changed my life. They succeeded in giving me a natural cycle where all modern medical interventions failed. If you’re experiencing any of the issues I’ve mentioned and need something new to boost your hopes, while I have no scientific proof to support this, just a miracle baby boy, why not give them a go? They do need a chance to work and you need to take them as directed, but hopefully they’ll give you a helping in hand in making your dreams come true.  I’m sure, like me, you’ll have read a million stories like this, cursed repeatedly, internally, at the stupidity of suggesting that miracles do happen but trust me they do. You just don’t know if or when they’ll happen to you. But you can increase your chances by trying everything!